Sunday, May 17, 2015
Saturday, May 9, 2015
5.9.15 Falling...
So here we are on the weekend, and I am finding time to write.
I feel like I have to clarify, the other day, E's class had a Mother's Day Tea, sigh. I couldn't take the van, still out of commission, more on that later. I knew I had, HAD to make it to this Tea, she had been talking about it for WEEKS. So, I called Bill, had an alternative and called someone else for a ride, no go. I ended up riding my bike, and actually in all honesty, I had wanted to try and ride my bike to the school. I wanted to see if I could do it. And I did. 5 miles round trip. I had moments of struggle and fear (I felt like I wanted to throw up before I even LEFT the house!) but I did it! How completely proud I am, of where I'm at, of how far I've come. All because I am TRUSTING who I am and where I'm at. God has brought me this far. I say that, because I couldn't have done this on my own.
Now then, Thursday, a break. I just wanted to take the day off, take it easy.
Friday~~ When we moved to Anchorage, I started taking Saturday mornings to myself. I would get up early and head out for coffee and garage sales. I came to this one house, a young adult and his mom where there. He was selling outdoor gear. A pair of rollerblades and all the padding caught my eye. I asked how much and he suggested like $25.00. I walked away with them and a dipnet for $25.00. I kinda feel bad now thinking back on it. Anyhow so Friday, I'm thinking about these rollerblades and decide, I'm going to DO THIS. And I DID. Albeit, I had E and her little friend on either side of me. I was FREAKED OUT. I couldn't even figure out how to stand, let alone...ROLL on these crazy things. Here I am all padded down, knees, elbows, wrists, and HEAD. We make it over to the mailbox (down the street and around the corner). E starts to rush and I lose my balance. I had a split second where I thought, "Ah, wait, I can keep myself up! Erg, why? I have padding. I will trust." I hit the ground knees then hands. Nothing. No jolt, no shock, no pain. I have to say, after that fall, I feel so much better. I don't nearly have the fear, because now I know. I know what it's like to fall, It's not that bad and I am still ALIVE. Ah. And here I am. I have lived to tell about it!
Is there an area of your life where you have been afraid to fall? Are you afraid of falling now? Did you put your knee pads on? Do you have support there to help you if you fall? (I ended up crawling the last three feet to the mailbox and pulling myself up) Have you already fallen and feel like this is the end? NO WAY BUDDY, YOU STILL HAVE TO GET YOUR MAIL AND GO HOME, NO OTHER OPTIONS.
Be blessed my friends, love you, love me, love you, love me.
I feel like I have to clarify, the other day, E's class had a Mother's Day Tea, sigh. I couldn't take the van, still out of commission, more on that later. I knew I had, HAD to make it to this Tea, she had been talking about it for WEEKS. So, I called Bill, had an alternative and called someone else for a ride, no go. I ended up riding my bike, and actually in all honesty, I had wanted to try and ride my bike to the school. I wanted to see if I could do it. And I did. 5 miles round trip. I had moments of struggle and fear (I felt like I wanted to throw up before I even LEFT the house!) but I did it! How completely proud I am, of where I'm at, of how far I've come. All because I am TRUSTING who I am and where I'm at. God has brought me this far. I say that, because I couldn't have done this on my own.
Now then, Thursday, a break. I just wanted to take the day off, take it easy.
 |
| Not this most flattering photo, but A REAL one, for the person I AM! :) |
Friday~~ When we moved to Anchorage, I started taking Saturday mornings to myself. I would get up early and head out for coffee and garage sales. I came to this one house, a young adult and his mom where there. He was selling outdoor gear. A pair of rollerblades and all the padding caught my eye. I asked how much and he suggested like $25.00. I walked away with them and a dipnet for $25.00. I kinda feel bad now thinking back on it. Anyhow so Friday, I'm thinking about these rollerblades and decide, I'm going to DO THIS. And I DID. Albeit, I had E and her little friend on either side of me. I was FREAKED OUT. I couldn't even figure out how to stand, let alone...ROLL on these crazy things. Here I am all padded down, knees, elbows, wrists, and HEAD. We make it over to the mailbox (down the street and around the corner). E starts to rush and I lose my balance. I had a split second where I thought, "Ah, wait, I can keep myself up! Erg, why? I have padding. I will trust." I hit the ground knees then hands. Nothing. No jolt, no shock, no pain. I have to say, after that fall, I feel so much better. I don't nearly have the fear, because now I know. I know what it's like to fall, It's not that bad and I am still ALIVE. Ah. And here I am. I have lived to tell about it!
Is there an area of your life where you have been afraid to fall? Are you afraid of falling now? Did you put your knee pads on? Do you have support there to help you if you fall? (I ended up crawling the last three feet to the mailbox and pulling myself up) Have you already fallen and feel like this is the end? NO WAY BUDDY, YOU STILL HAVE TO GET YOUR MAIL AND GO HOME, NO OTHER OPTIONS.
Be blessed my friends, love you, love me, love you, love me.
Wednesday, May 6, 2015
5.6.15 A Challenge Indeed
Well. It's been quite a week! It's been a whole week! I have realized weekends are a challenge to blog. I just want to spend time with the kids and Bill! Bill has Fridays off and that is our date day. We usually head out after the kids head to school. Grocery shopping, Bill paying, breakfast, coffee at home, just being together. Like I said I like to have laundry done by Thursday (or at least caught up), which I did last week, the baskets full of clothes never made it out of the laundry room. I honestly don't mind. Laundry was HONESTLY one of the most missed things during the rough chemo. I notice I still keep up with the dishes lately. :) Okay. Okay.
We had E's birthday on Sunday and had family and our Pastor, his wife and kids over for a little bbq. It was so nice. Tons of food! I can't believe how much I got done on Saturday and Sunday, other than a little nausea, I did fine. My new normal. Monday, I missed an ECHO, so reminder to self to schedule one. Tuesday doctor appt and chemo. PET scan showed something on my thyroid glands, but doesn't look like it's related to chemo and treatment. Also my scars/ seroma from mastectomy showing up, same as before, blech. I asked my oncologist if they could just cut me open and dig around. He laughed and said, "Not at this point". So for me at this point, I'm not worried or concerned. I feel really good, and homeboy (oncologist) said I look terrific and my coloring is really good.
Socially, I'm coming out of my shell again. I'm not sure why I was hiding for so long. I think I've been afraid of hurting others. Or boring them to... tears. I hung out with a fellow survivor/ cancer thriver before my PET scan. Then before treatment I hung out with my cousin. Today I stopped by a neighbor's and caught up with her. All of those little visits along with the birthday party, WOW, little social butterfly I am!
Physically I haven't lost any weight, but I am very conscience of what I am eating. I didn't take any naps last week, didn't sleep in this weekend and rode my bike with E over to the park on Monday. About a mile away? Almost a mile? Then today E had a Mother's Day Tea in her class. The van is still out of commission (key didn't work) and I wanted to ride my bike, I wanted to challenge myself to see if I could do it. I DID IT! 5 miles round trip! C-R-A-Z-Y! So happy am I!
So tonight since I didn't do a to do and tada list... My tip for friends, if riding your bike this Spring or even later in the summer, wear light gloves! It will keep them from drying out and keep your hands young! :)
We had E's birthday on Sunday and had family and our Pastor, his wife and kids over for a little bbq. It was so nice. Tons of food! I can't believe how much I got done on Saturday and Sunday, other than a little nausea, I did fine. My new normal. Monday, I missed an ECHO, so reminder to self to schedule one. Tuesday doctor appt and chemo. PET scan showed something on my thyroid glands, but doesn't look like it's related to chemo and treatment. Also my scars/ seroma from mastectomy showing up, same as before, blech. I asked my oncologist if they could just cut me open and dig around. He laughed and said, "Not at this point". So for me at this point, I'm not worried or concerned. I feel really good, and homeboy (oncologist) said I look terrific and my coloring is really good.
Socially, I'm coming out of my shell again. I'm not sure why I was hiding for so long. I think I've been afraid of hurting others. Or boring them to... tears. I hung out with a fellow survivor/ cancer thriver before my PET scan. Then before treatment I hung out with my cousin. Today I stopped by a neighbor's and caught up with her. All of those little visits along with the birthday party, WOW, little social butterfly I am!
Physically I haven't lost any weight, but I am very conscience of what I am eating. I didn't take any naps last week, didn't sleep in this weekend and rode my bike with E over to the park on Monday. About a mile away? Almost a mile? Then today E had a Mother's Day Tea in her class. The van is still out of commission (key didn't work) and I wanted to ride my bike, I wanted to challenge myself to see if I could do it. I DID IT! 5 miles round trip! C-R-A-Z-Y! So happy am I!
So tonight since I didn't do a to do and tada list... My tip for friends, if riding your bike this Spring or even later in the summer, wear light gloves! It will keep them from drying out and keep your hands young! :)
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